What if?
by DiVine DionnE
Summary: When Shamal accidentally releases a mosquito that switches the bodies of the cast.Things get weird, with Yamamoto in Hibari's body, Tsuna in Reborn's, and more. Madness was bound to ensue. And Raito was there to babysit them all. Poor Raito. No Pairing.
1. The Mosquito with Body Switching Powers

**AN: **A random thought when I was reading volume four of Ouran High School Host Club!

Enjoy~

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><p>When has the last time a normal day has occurred in Raito's life? Maybe…six months ago? Yeah, well she had already lost count. The day that Raito joined (or in Reborn's case, forced) to be in Tsuna's family, things had turn for the weird and everyday she had to avoid bombs, grenades, dynamite sticks, bullets, and objects that fly out of nowhere (which could probably be poison or highly explosive items in disguise.)<p>

Being in the mafia…she wouldn't exactly say that it was all fun. Sure, the people in the mafia in particular are a weird and fun bunch but with the continues threats towards her life…she had to wonder every day, how many days she had left before being brutally killed by either a tonfa or a baseball bat.

Raito wasn't necessarily recruited because of any special abilities. Everything about her was average…except the fact that she could calm down Gokudera, Hibari, Lambo, and Mukuro…well; actually "calm down" is a strong word…more like prevent them from killing each other or other people by being a human shield. Plus, she was practically a book entitled: "The Secrets of the Men of The Vongola Family and beyond". She did sometimes hate the fact that she was so observant.

Raito eats the popcorn on the bowl placed on top of her lap as she watches the usual happenings in the house of the Sawada household. Reborn had planned for a party (for no apparent reason) and Tsuna couldn't protest since Nana Sawada was equally excited about the party. Too bad that Haru and Kyoko were too busy to join the party preparations…so the job went to Hibari and Mukuro.

Gokudera had not been happy with the decision but it was Reborn who suggested it so no real argument could be started. Raito had sweet talked Hibari and Mukuro to come and help…well that's what she liked to tell herself but the truth was that she begged Hibari to help and promised Hibari that she'd archive the school records and then she begged Mukuro and promised him that she'd tell him a secret about Hibari (she really didn't had one but she'll cross the bridge when she gets there, she just hoped that Mukuro wouldn't haunt her for life if he finds out that she was just lying.)

"Kufufu~ Why don't you help Raito-chan~?" Mukuro asks in his usual fashioned tone of voice.

"Please," Raito scoffs and pops popcorns in her mouth. "I almost got 'bitten to death' by Hibari, shot at by Reborn and, Lambo almost set my hair on fire! I aint' moving an inch on this chair." To further prove her point, she slams the bowl of popcorn on the table and continues to eat.

"Kufufu~"

"Leave her be Mukuro," Gokudera scoffs as he hangs up the banner. "She's just being her usual whiny self."

"Hey!" Raito throws a handful of popcorn at the back of Gokudera's head. "You try to get a carnivorous tonfa wielding prefect to agree with your terms and let's see how you fair."

"HE ISN'T EVEN HELPING!"

"NOT MY PROBLEM!"

"Now, now." Yamamoto comes and breaks the verbal insults with his usual cheery smile. "Let's just finish this so that we can start with the party, alright?"

"Y-Yeah…Let's just finish this, alright?" Tsuna stutters out with a nervous smile.

"You're just scared Tsuna, that Reborn's going to shot you from the window over there." Raito points at a random window and Tsuna ducks quickly. Raito snickers playfully as Gokudera sends her a nasty glare.

"You seem to know a lot about us, Raito." Reborn, coincidentally, appears on the window that Raito was pointing at not a second later. Raito smiles and pushes herself up and grabs the bowl of popcorn.

"Months of observation, Reborn-san. Since the only thing I do in this "family" is observe and prevent the "family members" from creating mass murder. Because this happens frequently I tend to pick up some mannerisms you guys do. Like Gokudera with his obsession with Tsuna."

"Hey!"

"E-Eh?"

Raito ignores their reactions and walks towards the door but almost loses her balance when an annoying perverted doctor burst opens the door. Raito places the bowl on the table and glares at Shamal.

"Good afternoon my lovely Raito-chan~" Shamal opens his arms and runs towards Ratio. Raito immediately reacts, through reflex, and takes the bowl of popcorn and hurls it towards Shamal…effectively stopping him and sending him to the floor.

But as he falls down on the floor a white box fell from his coat pockets and onto the floor. As the white box thuds on the floor it opens up unexpectedly and out comes a hoard of mosquito's and without a warning each one of them started landing on everyone's arm (especially Reborn and Shamal) and proceeded to drink their blood.

Everyone started dropping like flies,

And the last thing Raito remembered was seeing a world that was too black to see anything to see.

* * *

><p>"M-My h-head," Raito pushes herself off of the floor and clutches her head in pain. Looking around tiredly, Raito blinks and looks at Yamamoto sleeping on the table, Gokudera next to Tsuna, Reborn and Shamal on the floor, and Mukuro and Hibari also leaning against the wall asleep. Raito, through hazy eyes, crawls towards the sleeping Gokudera and shakes him to wake him up.<p>

"G-Gokudera…w-wake u-up," She didn't know why but her tongue felt so clumsy that she had to say every word carefully or they'll slur. Gokudera refused to wake up and Raito groans. Well, time for her secret weapon then. She leans towards Gokudera's ear and whispers,

"G-Gokudera…y-you n-need t-to w-wake u-up o-or T-Tsuna's going to die a horrible death."

And just like that Gokudera's eyes flew open and immediately, he stands up with dynamites on hand.

"TENTH!" Gokudera shouts and Raito shushes him.

"S-Shut u-up w-would you?" Gokudera ignores her plea and walks towards Tsuna and tries to shake him awake but he doesn't respond.

"I-I'll t-take care of this," Raito crawls to Tsuna and whispers, "T-Tsuna…I'm dying."

And immediately Tsuna got on his feet with wide brown eyes.

"R-RAITO-CHAN! YOU'RE DYING?" Raito shakes his head no and Tsuna visibly relaxes. With Tsuna and Gokudera awake she crawls to the next person, Yamamoto, and whispers as her mind becomes more clearer,

"Y-Yamamoto…Tsuna just died."

"TSUNA!"

Then with the same exchange she crawls to Mukuro and whispers,

"Mukuro, Tsuna's unconscious and unarmed."

"Kufufu~"

Then, to Reborn.

"Reborn…I know you're not asleep so just open your eyes already."

"Ciassou."

"R-REBORN! Y-YOU'RE AWAKE?"

Then, to Hibari.

"Hibari…Gokudera is vandalising the school hallways."

"WHAT THE HELL WOMAN?"

"I'll bite you to death for vandalising the school hallways herbivore."

Then, to Shamal.

"Shamal…Why is that woman openly jogging naked?"

"WHERE? WHERE?"

Raito sighs as everyone tries to get their bearings right. Even when everyone was unconscious, they can still stir up a mess when they wake up. Raito's head starts to feel heavy as she leans on the wall for support. Tsuna was the one to notice and runs towards her.

"R-Raito-Chan…are you okay?"

Raito nods weakly and turns to Shamal with an accusing glare.

"What the hell was inside that white box? I feel like I just like I went through a night of drinking liquor. AND I DON'T DRINK!"

Shamal's eyes widen in recognition and looks down on the box that had fallen. He sighs and runs his hands through his black unkempt hair. Raito gulps and looks at Shamal worriedly.

"W-What?" Raito asks nervously.

"We just got bitten by the mind switching mosquito," Shamal says with a worried tone to his voice.

"M-Meaning?" Raito asks.

"Meaning, in twenty-four hours…" Shamal dramatically pauses as everyone's attention was on him. "Our minds…will switch with somebody else's body."

. . .

"WHAT?" Everybody exclaims and Raito just stared open mouthed. Did he just say that their minds were going to switch with someone else's body? That can't be possible…can it?

"It's an experiment I was researching on and it got out of its case, it seems. So from my experiments…someone's going to switch minds with someone…or if you like, someone's going to switch bodies with someone else."

Apparently it can. Hey, if time travelling is allowed then why should mosquito mind switching powers be not?

"So…by some time tomorrow. Someone…in this small group's going to switch minds?"

Raito exclaims and Shamal nods. Raito pales.

"B-But I don't want to be in your bodies!" Raito points accusingly at all them. "I DON'T WANT YOUR MALE PARTS!"

"WE'LL WE DON'T WANT YOUR'S EITHER, WOMAN!"

"I do~"

"Kufufu~ me too~"

Raito takes a deep breath and tries to calm herself down. Hitting Shamal and/or Mukuro won't help. Sure, it'll relieve the stress but nonetheless it won't solve anything. Raito rubs her forehead and was amazed that Hibari was still sticking around. Probably because he also didn't want to switch bodies with anybody else.

"So, who'll switch minds Shamal?" Reborn asks, eerily calms with the whole situation. While almost everyone was already panicking (expect for Reborn, Mukuro, Hibari, and Yamamoto of course.)

"Hmm…can't say. Since I haven't perfected it yet I can't predict who's going to switch with whom. All I know is that the effects will wear off by the end of the day."

"W-Well that good news right?" Tsuna offers a little reassurance and Raito just shakes her head.

"No, no that is NOT good! I'm the only girl here! That means I have 100% chance of switching with any of you!"

"Actually, you have a 101% chance of that."

"I really don't need to be corrected right now Gokudera."

"Actually, Gokudera is wrong," Shamal speaks up and they all turn to him. "There is also the possibility that you won't switch with anyone because, like I said, it's still not yet perfect. So while you guys adjust, I'll go find a way to cure this. Bye~"

Before anyone could shout or hurt Shamal, he was out of the door before you could say anything. Raito sighs and looks at the mafia men. Hibari had already left and Reborn was staring at her…wait what? That can't be good.

"It's your responsibility Raito to keep everyone in check."

"What? What do you mean?"

Reborn smirks and pulls his fedora down.

"You have good observational skills and that's what we need to survive this so that Shamal will be able to find a cure. I'll start searching too. Ciao~"

"W-Wait Reborn!"

And just like Shamal he was out. Raito stares wide eyed before gripping her hair in anger.

"WHY DOES IT ALWAYS HAVE TO BE ME?"

* * *

><p>~Side Story~<p>

"Good afternoon my lovely Raito-chan~" Shamal opens his arms and runs towards Ratio. Raito immediately reacts, through reflex, and takes the bowl of popcorn and hurls it towards Shamal…effectively stopping him and sending him to the floor.

Bianchi suddenly walks in and stares the unconscious doctor on the floor. With a smile on her face she turns to Raito and nods.

"Good work, dear grasshopper! You have improved."

Raito nods and bows. "Thank you sensei. I did learn from the best."

"SIS! WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU TEACHING HER!"

Raito and Bianchi turn to Gokudera with identical smirk as they both say,

"Girl stuff~"

Gokudera could only stare blankly.


	2. First Day Polar Opposites

**AN: **Originally I inteded to have no pairing for this story. Whatsoever. Becuase I wanted to write a story just full of crack. But the love bug has bitten me on the butt and it demands some romance!

But I can't decide who to pair Raito up with! So I want to turn to you guys.

**VOTINGS ARE NOW OPEN FOR: "WHO SHALL RAITO END UP WITH?"**

The list of prisoners...I mean _candidates_ are the following:

**Tsuna **

**Gokudera**

**Yamamoto**

If you want to add more people to the list then tell me and I'll add it. But please make it believable. NO 1ST GENERATION HOTTIES! Because I have no idea how to place Alude, for example, to the story. VOTING WILL END AT CHAPTER 4! So hurry up and cast your votes! Ciao~**  
><strong>

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><p><strong>Next Day<strong>

Raito fidgets nervously as she brushes her hair with French toast in between her mouth. As she hurriedly tries to tame her long brown hair and button up her uniform at the same time, her mind kept on coming up to yesterday's events. Because of Shamal, another mafia incident was going to happen and this time she had to be the babysitter. She knew that this was originally her fault because of knocking Shamal down but whose fault was it that those demonic mosquito's was brought in Tsuna's house anyway?

With one last button in place, she runs out of her house and runs towards the intersection where Gokudera, Yamamoto, Tsuna, and she will meet up. Maybe the mosquito's were dull and actually did nothing wrong to any of them?

She really hoped so…because she really, _really_ didn't want Reborn's body…or Mukuro's…really, any…body that has any male body parts. (She's pretty sure that her mother didn't have enough money for therapy)

Raito halts and cringes at that very thought.

With one last sigh, Raito continues to walk towards the intersection with a slow pace. A smile takes hold of her lips as she see's Gokudera and Tsuna waiting for her. She briefly wonders why Yamamoto wasn't there and quickly questions the first person near her.

"Morning, guys! Has Yamamoto arrived yet?" Raito asks and Gokudera just scoffs…meaning that yeah, Yamamoto was definitely late.

"Hmm…I wonder why his late? His usually the first one up…after Ryohei that is. After all, he does have to run around Namimori for his exercise."

Gokudera and Tsuna stare blankly at her as she raises an eyebrow.

"What?"

"How the hell do you even know that, woman?"

Raito grins. "I observe therefore I know," She smirks at Gokudera's scowl. "Just like how I know that you go shirtless when you go to sleep~" **[1]**

Gokudera and Tsuna pales as Raito laughs happily. Well, is she was going to be a "babysitter" then she'll mess up the "kids" as best she can. (Plus, she didn't want to waste Lambo's efforts as he risked his young annoying life by scaling Gokudera's apartment and taking very good pictures for blackmail.)

"Oh, Yamamoto's coming!" Tsuna exclaims as he waves him over. Raito turns around and her eyes widen. Yamamoto was wearing his jacket just like Hibari (he even got the swaying in the wind right!) and the usual bright smile on his face disappeared. Raito, Tsuna, and Gokudera were all taken a back.

When Yamamoto was just in front of them, with him towering all three of them, he raises an eyebrow and the first thing out of his mouth made the three of them feel like they just gut punched on the stomach.

"Herbivores."

Yeah, not a very normal Yamamoto greeting (Unless he was trying to imitate Hibari then Raito definitely knew that if the mafia thing didn't work out…Yamamoto could be a really good actor)

"Y-Yamamoto-kun?"

"Oi, baseball freak! Why the hell are you talking like Hibari?"

Yamamoto raises an eyebrow and glares…_glares_…at all three of them. Raito and Tsuna huddle together with equal shock and fear marring their faces. Yamamoto _glaring_ was just too much of a shock for both of them.

"Fix this…**now**." Yamamoto _demands_.

Raito holds Tsuna closer and vice versa as they both silently pray that Yamamoto…err Hibari…wouldn't produce a tonfa out of nowhere and start beating both of them up for just looking at him.

"O-Okay," Raito, after finally finding her voice, speaks up. "We can fix this…at least I _think_ we can fix this…Dear Neptune, please let this be fixed."

"Y-Yamamoto-kun…I mean H-Hibari-san! Where are you going?" Tsuna asks bringing everyone's attention to Hibari walking away in Yamamoto's body.

"Dear Neptune," Raito gasps. "His going to Nami-Middle!"

They both look at each other and went off running towards the new carnivorous baseball nut.

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><p>When the natural balance of things go berserk, you already know that that's the time to take cover and run. (Any direction will do…as long as you, well, run.)<p>

Like flowers starting to shoot bullets at unsuspecting passerby's or cat's starting to bark the ABC's and when this things will happen, you already know that something bad is going to happen.

But when you see Hibari in his usual Hibari-ness and his _smiling_…Well, the end of the world might just be around the corner.

Raito stood on the entrance of Nami-Middle, with Gokudera and Tsuna beside her, flabbergasted. Hibari, the carnivorous prefect, was there greeting everyone with a smile and a cheery laugh (said everyone looked like they just saw a celebrity greeting them…some just started running around and shouting that the end of the world was already here)

"Watching Hibari laugh," Raito comments dryly. "Is kind of hot."

"Damn it woman!" Gokudera shouts furiously. "Watching that carnivorous prefect laugh…is creepy."

"Come on, watching _the_ Hibari laugh is a little hot. Even _you_ have to admit that…anyway, do you think Yamamoto knows that his currently inhabiting a very hot body right now and pulling it off really, _really_ well?"

Gokudera scoffs and decided to disregard everything she said up to the point of her question. "I don't think so."

Raito tilts her head up and blinks innocently at Gokudera. "How so?"

"His trying to figure out why his jacket is staying on even with the strong gust."

"Hmm…" Raito hums and nods as she watches the same scene as Gokudera. "I've always wondered how Hibari's jacket defied the rules of gravity. Maybe this is the perfect time to steal it and do some horrible unimaginable test on it?"

"Guys!" Tsuna interjects with a nervous smile on his face. "Shouldn't we be finding Yamamoto…I mean Hibari…before he causes trouble?"

"Or before he kills Yamamoto for what his doing with Hibari's body." Gokudera comments and a deadly silence fall over them. Raito runs the different scenario if Yamamoto and Hibari meet. One which included a bloody battle where she knew that no detergent could wash away. (Plus, explaining it to her mother would be _really_ hard)

"Alright," Raito announces bringing all of their attention back to her and away from the smiling (hotly, she might add) Yamamoto-slash-Hibari. "I'll go look for Hibari-slash-Yamamoto while you…chain Yamamoto-slash-Hibari to pole or anything that he can't break so he won't do anything…Yamamoto-ish."

"Yamamoto-ish?" Tsuna asks with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, would _you_ want to see Hibari taking off his shirt after playing baseball?" Raito looks up and smiles. "Scratch that reasoning…actually, I kind of want to see that."

Gokudera and Tsuna stare at her blankly and she raises an eyebrow and Gokudera supplies an answer,

"What is wrong with you woman?"

"What?" She pouts and places her hands on her hips. "I happen to be a girl and a girl has needs."

Gokudera scoffs and rolls his eyes. "Just go before you poison the Tenth's mind."

"Pfft," Raito scoffs as she starts to walk away in the different direction. "I've done _that_ a _long time_ ago."

Gokudera gapes and looks to Tsuna for confirmation and Tsuna could only nod and cringe at the memory.

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><p>When Hibari and Yamamoto switch bodies…you would expect to find Hibari-slash-Yamamoto in just a snap of the fingers. Turns out, it was exactly the opposite.<p>

Raito knew that to look for Yamamoto…all you had to do was find A.) A hoard of love sick school girls or B.) A place where there's a good amount of space, a bat, and ball.

And to look for Hibari you have to look for B.) A place where it's usually busy but now unusually quiet or B.) Blood and multiple bodies piled on top of each other.

But when it's Hibari in Yamamoto's body…it can be really…confusing.

First, you have to factor in the people who aren't aware of the whole body switching thing and since people don't necessarily like to flock near Hibari…flocking near Yamamoto now was suicidal.

And secondly, Raito was pursuing a pissed off prefect in Yamamoto's body (Which meant horrible dreams where Yamamoto would be running after her with a machete)

Raito pants and leans against the railings of the stairs towards the roof. Sure, she knew that Hibari-slash-Yamamoto could be currently residing in somewhere else…but Hibari and the roof just go hand in hand.

Raito places a cold hand on the doorknob and turns it as the continuous mantra of: "Hibari, please don't kill me." Continues to echo in her head. Sure she could see herself being killed by Hibari but being killed by Hibari in Yamamoto's body…well that could effectively kill half of the population of Nami-Middle.

Raito cautiously opens the door and peaks on the other side. She sighs in relief when she sees no one on the other side. On one hand she had to look for Hibari again but on the other hand…SHE GETS TO LIVE LONGER!

Raito walks forward and looks around the empty roof. A huge grin appears on her face and starts doing a little dance.

"I get to live a little longer~" She twirls around and around but stops immediately when the familiar anthem of Nami-Middle reaches her ears. She froze and turned around. There, standing like a predator ready to pounce on Raito. She edge away from Hibari-slash-Yamamoto who was glaring at her.

"H-Hey, H-Hibari-sama!" She waves awkwardly but Hibari-slash-Yamamoto keeps on glaring as Hibird takes its seat on Hibari-slash-Yamamoto on his shoulder. "Y-You do know that my mom knows where I am right?"

Hibari-slash-Yamamoto walks towards her with Hibari's tonfa's in his hands. Raito raises her hands in front of her and takes small steps backwards.

"Please don't kill me! Why would you want to kill me? This is all Shamal's fault! Kill him!" She tries to argue with the carnivorous baseball nut. A deadly smirk took hold of his lips and it made Raito's eye widen a bit. She knew that Hibari-slash-Yamamoto will kill her but seeing Yamamoto so dark…it was kind of hot.

"Herbivore." He says to her warningly. "I want to hit something."

"Then, hit the wall! Hit the goddamn wall! It's just like hitting someone. Except the fact that it's solid and could destroy every bone in your fingers…and wall-y." She snickered despite herself. "Wallll-y~" She says in a robotic voice and Hibari-slash-Yamamoto did not found this amusing as he raised his tonfa's in front of her face.

"Okay! Okay! Making jokes about inspirational robots is off limits. I get it! Just…" She blinks pleadingly. "Think of the children Hibari! What will Lambo do if I don't give him his usual bedtime stories? What will I-pin do if we don't have our annual dumpling cooking competition? What will Fuuta do if I'm not there to buy him cakes? What will Gokudera and Tsuna do if I'm not here to annoy them? Hibari _please_…the children _need_ me."

Hibari-slash-Yamamoto stays unfazed and raises an eyebrow. "What are you talking about herbivore?"

"I DON'T KNOW!" She shouts. "I'm about to die here so _you_ don't get to complain as to what I say on my final moments!"

Hibari-slash-Yamamoto raises a tonfa and readies to bash it on her head when the door opens and in walks Gokudera, Tsuna, and Yamamoto-slash-Hibari. Raito ducks before the tonfa could bash her head in. The tonfa makes contact with the fence as the sounds of metal on metal rang out.

Raito runs towards the nearest person and hugs them to death…and that was Gokudera. Raito cries happily as Gokudera tries to pry her off of him.

"Let go of me you insufferable woman!"

"Gokudera!" She cries happily and ignores his protests. "I've never been so happy to see your face! And that's saying a lot."

"Haha! Nice to see you two getting along Raito-chan, Gokudera-kun!" The sudden interruption of the familiar prefect's voice brought Raito out of her small victory. She turns her head and looks up at Yamamoto-slash-Hibari who. Was. _Grinning_.

"Okay, I take it back. Watching Hibari smile is creepy. Please stop smiling Yamamoto-slash-Hibari." Raito pleads and this time Yamamoto-slash-Hibari ended up laughing. Both Tsuna and Raito cringe.

"Please Yamamoto stop…just stop laughing. Think of dead puppies. Think of skewered bunnies…think of Gokudera being the mascot of McDonalds! Anything!"

They all look at Raito and Gokudera scowls.

"…Why?" Gokudera asks.

"Because it's fun."

"Herbivores." Hibari-slash-Yamamoto mutters dangerously and they all turn to him and watch as he brings up his tonfa's. Hibari-slash-Yamamoto charges towards them but Raito quickly shouts,

"Wait!" Hibari-slash-Yamamoto surprisingly stops in his track as Raito points behind him. "Look! The sun is setting!"

"Congratulations woman, you finally know which is which." Gokudera added his two cents and Raito sends him a glare.

"Don't you remember what Shamal said? Everything will go back to normal once the sun sets."

"Are you sure, herbivore?"

"Yep!" She shouts happily. "I bet Gokudera's life on it."

"WHAT THE HELL?"

"Please Gokudera," She scoffs. "Trying to _sing_ like Avril Lavigne? How pitiful."

"So…umm…" Tsuna interjects to stop the fight from escalating. "We just wait until they…switch back…?"

"Well…that's what I'm hoping for." Hibari-slash-Yamamoto gives Raito a glare. "I mean yes! Yes that's what will happen! And if it doesn't…blame Shamal."

"Woman…" Gokudera hisses out.

"What? Be thankful I'm not blaming you for this."

Gokudera sighs and found no reason to continue the battle. A long silence stretches on they stared at Hibari-slash-Yamamoto and Yamamoto-slash-Hibari. And suddenly Hibari-slash-Yamamoto was thrown back and Hibari-slash-Yamamoto stood unaffected. With the sun finally going down.

The familiar scowl on the prefects face was back on his body and Yamamoto's cheery smile was back on his body.

Raito raises her hands and smiles. "Hallelujah! The world is right again!"

"…Until tomorrow that is." Gokudera comments and Raito sulks.

Damn. So it wasn't over yet?

* * *

><p><strong>[1] I'd loooove to see that. Wouldn't you? *wink*<strong>


End file.
